It has been a while since I last read your OS. I'm glad that you came back with one! And it's angsty, which makes me brace myself for the impact of sadness.
Thankfully I had gotten the chance to read this amazing work of yours.
Guess I should comment a bit about the story and my opinions before answering your question.
I've actually watched a documentary on the so-called Suicide Forest within Japan a year ago or so. It might sound weird, but I find it fascinating that many would come to this one forest to do their deeds. Probably because it's isolated away from the outside society and a place where the individual can focus only on their mind and examine their situation at hand. Though not everyone commits suicide in there and thankfully some camped overnight a day or two to decide that death won't solve their problems. As a person who has been down on this road before and struggling through it, it touched me on a certain level, haha.
Now in regard to your story, the flashbacks of both Mayu and Yuki spending time together and exchanging to each other is cute! It's regretful that the mission became a disaster though... Although they finally caught the rapist, in the end Mayu was broken. Even though Yuki was by her side and trying to protect her from anymore danger, the other people posting up Mayu's photo of the ordeal just had to make things worse. And when Mayu left, I guess it's predictable to see what she was to commit based on her lack of actions and motivation to even go through a single day. Poor Yuki... She broken down in the end and decided to end her life also. I pray that those two meet each other in the afterlife and you know, if they are able to reincarnate, be together just like their former self.
I honestly felt my heart crack yet at the same time, both sympathy and empathy for the two. Though I'm still slightly puzzled with Mayu's reason to why she ended her life, doesn't everyone do when they see someone they love and care for leave the world with such sudden timing? I had a friend back a while ago who had committed such act due to bullying. Though I honestly don't know why he had done it, I can feel Yuki's and Sae's pain of being tormented of being useless at the time with Mayu. "Why can't we stop them? Isn't there anyway to persuade them? Why wasn't I there with them before they pulled the trigger to their own life?" Those kind of thoughts that rush through our head won't stop till many years pass by with the realization that they decided to take their own life. Of course, with this situation, it's different since Yuki is in love with Mayu, not just friends. So I guess Yuki can't live without her Mayu in the living world.
I find it ironic that I haven't felt my heart shatter. I think it's because it hasn't hit me yet, haha. I'll probably end up curling into a ball... in the corner of the room... feeling every piece of my heart fall apart piece by piece from every passing second. Or it might be that I'm emotionally numb after reading this, LOL.
Now for the questions:
Questions: Who did you think Takamina and co. were looking for at the beginning? When and how did you realise Yuki wanted to commit suicide?
I was unsure of who it was honestly in the very beginning. I knew that it was someone that wanted to commit suicide due to the key word 'Aokigahara.' And we know that person they were looking for was a female. So thanks to the main pairing of the one shot, I immediately locked my eyes between Mayu or Yuki. But after that beginning scene when we now flash towards Yuki, I already got the answer.
It was easy to pinpoint when and how she wanted to commit suicide in this act. Unlike Yuko who had slashed her wrist and chose the path of bleeding to death, there was a mention of a 'roll of thick brown rope.' I obviously know that she isn't planning to climb up a tree for the hell of it or playing a single person jumprope (oh the lame jokes I could make), so entering this forest + rope + mind repeating over and over about Mayu's action from the year before = mind set on ending her own life. Unless something else played into this matter, Yuki's head probably started revolving around killing herself when Mayu had committed the act.
Thank you so much for writing this OS! I do find many authors and writers write, well... on this sensitive topic. But I just came to a realization that you're the first person that I've read actually revolving it around the Suicide Forest. Definitely angsty and hits a home run on the emotional level. Sometimes killing the characters off will make the story move onward to our desired purpose of the fiction. (Can't really have a story based on death, well... have literally every single people both antagonist and protagonist/support character live! That should probably be labeled under a story based on 'life', haha) Interesting concept and that last quote you added on your author's note:
"Those who commit suicide die but once. Those left behind die a thousand times, wondering why."
- Unknown
Very good quote to keep in mind. Not to mention accurate. The aftereffect of losing someone may be tragic, but when it's from an act of suicide, it impacts us greatly since it can be avoidable. Unlike cancer and passing from old age, this can be controlled and is intended from the person themselves. It's a shame though that our human mind resort to short distant thinking and believe that ending our life will end our suffering and problems. Life truly is harsh yet if we keep on moving forward, even if only a step for the day, that's not only progressing towards the fact that you're alive but towards the change that we all wish for with effort.
I'm glad to have read this for today and I truly am looking forward to the Doctor Watanabe x Nurse Kashiwagi series update soon! Please take your time on it as I will be waiting patiently~ Looking forward to more of your OS work too in the near future!
[And holy cow, I just noticed how long my comments are. And the lack of emoticon I wanted to use too...
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